"Our love was color blind... but our families weren't", 1948

"Our love was color blind... but our families weren't", 1948

When Mary met Jake, a black man who she fell in love with, her father heavily criticized her for it. They are now 63 years married. Here is what she had to say about her life: "When I told my father I was going to marry Jake he said, ‘If you marry that man you will never set foot in this house again.’⁣ ⁣ "He was horrified that I could contemplate marrying a black man, and I soon learned that most people felt the same way. The first years of our marriage living in Birmingham were hell — I cried every day, and barely ate. No one would speak to us, we couldn’t find anywhere to live because no one would rent to a black man, and we had no money.⁣" ⁣ "People would point at us in the street. Then I gave birth to a stillborn son at eight months. It wasn’t related to the stress I was under but it broke my heart, and we never had any more children.⁣" ⁣ We were at the same technical college. I was having typing and shorthand lessons and he’d been sent there for training by the Air Force. He was with a group of black friends and they called my friend and me over to talk. We didn’t even know they spoke English, but Jake and I got chatting. He quoted Shakespeare to me, which I loved.⁣" ⁣ Jake returned to Trinidad, but we carried on writing to each other, and a few years later he returned to the UK to get better paid work.⁣ ⁣ "He asked me to marry him, quite out of the blue, when I was only 19. My father threw me out, and I left with only one small suitcase to my name. No family came to our register office wedding in 1948.⁣ But gradually life became easier. I got teaching jobs, ending up as a deputy head teacher. First Jake worked in a factory, then for the Post Office.⁣ Slowly we made friends together, but it was so hard. I used to say to new friends: ‘Look, I have to tell you this before I invite you to my home — my husband is black." ⁣ "My father died when I was 30 and although we were reconciled by then, he never did approve of Jake.⁣ ⁣ Today we have been married for 63 years, and are still very much in love. I do not regret marrying him for an instant, despite all the pain we have suffered".